September is right around the corner (and by “around the corner,” I mean tomorrow). And while it brings many wonderful things (I’m looking at you, fall colors and apple cider), it also signals the end of summer, the beginning of fall, and the shuffle toward cooler weather.

With school activities, heady work schedules, family obligations, and holidays around the corner, it’s easy for our time outside to become more limited. In the summer, we make time to stay outside for one more scoop of ice cream, one more cannonball into the lake, and a long, leisurely dinner on the patio. But as we move toward fall, the days start getting shorter, and there just doesn’t seem to be enough time—not to mention enough daylight—to do more than jump in the car, get where you need to go, and get back home again.

Today is your day to reclaim your time outside.

In these last days of summer, it’s easy to get caught up in the next thing on your list. You aren’t crazy, it’s getting dark sooner. It does feel like you have less hours at the end of the day.

​But that list isn’t really going anywhere. Set it aside, leave your phone in the house, take time out for #nationaleatoutsideday, and the people you love best. Remind yourself that it will all get done, that you have what it takes—and that chances are, you’ll feel even better once you’ve had a chance to unwind. 

​Story by Emilie Duck

Maybe you’ve just PCSed with your family… and it’s time for your kids to start school. You’re in a new house, a new town. You’ve still got boxes shoved in corners, can only reliably get to three places within a five-mile radius, and are wondering if that new normal will kick in before the homework and after school practices arrive.

Maybe your family has been on one place, but you know this is the last year. That move is right around the corner. Every moment is a beginning and an ending—the last first day of school, the last fall, the last festival… And you still don’t know what comes next.

Maybe you’re preparing for your first week in the classroom as a student or a teacher. Maybe you aren’t the one in the classroom at all—maybe it’s your spouse. Suddenly there is paper everywhere, whether it’s papers to grade or assignments to read… or papers that aren’t even yours, but that you can’t throw away on the off-chance that they might be important sometime before December.

Maybe you have no real ties to school at all, aside from cheering on your alma mater. Maybe you’ve noticed that your commute is twice as long thanks to morning drop off, or that the parking has disappeared in your college town. Your morning routine is no longer school-proof.

Maybe you’re wondering if it’s time to go back to school—if you’re meant to be doing something else. Maybe this is the year you’re going to apply.

No matter who you are, it seems like new beginnings are around every corner.

When it comes to the beginning, there’s an impulse to believe that everything hinges on that first day or that first week.

Before the beginning officially begins, we can imagine ourselves conquering a to-do list a mile long, embracing challenges with nonchalance, and exceeding even our own high expectations.

We’ll get out the door on time. We’ll have breakfast, make polite conversation after only two sips of coffee, and know exactly where we’re going. We’ll get to know the new names and faces in record time, we’ll make friends quickly, and the homework will practically do itself. The kids in our lives will remember their socks and shoes before getting in the car, will eagerly share the highs and lows of their first day, and everything will fall into place.

These things will happen … just maybe not all at once.

If I’ve learned anything from my years of back to school, it’s that back to school is a process, not a destination.

Your back to school journey won’t look like your civilian counterparts, whether you’re a parent, a student, a teacher, a spouse, or a student-in-the-making. So, don’t hold yourself to the standard of what things “should” be like.

Instead, know that things are they way they are in part because you’re living this military life.

Sometimes military life comes with compensations, and sometimes it comes with challenges that you didn’t even know to expect. Give yourself room for those surprises, the good and the bad, and give yourself credit for rising up to meet them.

Truth be told, the first six weeks of any new beginning are more like an experiment than a check off list. Some things will work, and some things will not. There are successes (thank goodness), but no failures—just moments you know you’d rather not repeat.

As you make your way through the first six weeks of this new year, whatever your role, know that we’re cheering you on (and no, we aren’t going to ask you to make any treats for the bake sale).

​​Story by Emilie Duck

Let’s all agree: networking is good for your career. 

It can help you learn about what jobs are out there-but might not be published (commonly referred to as the hidden job market), get the inside scoop on companies from people who already work there, troubleshoot career problems with other professionals, and stay relevant in your field. 

But what if you are uncomfortable connecting with others? How can an introvert network professionally?

There are LOTS of outlets that exist for networking—from live and in-person local networking groups to professional groups on LinkedIn® to professional Facebook pages, which can be a great venue for networking if you are new to and uncomfortable with the idea of networking.

We understand that live and in person networking isn’t for everyone. If you are an introvert—and you aren’t alone—then, the idea of going to a restaurant or other venue and meeting people for the first time face to face may be overwhelming. If the thought of meeting people face to face gives you the sweats, then NETWORKING ONLINE is a great option for you.

(It’s also a great option for those of you who are remotely located or want an international network instead of just a local one!)

You can join groups and SLOWLY join the conversation with little effort. You can connect easily and engage based on your own comfort level, and you don't even have to leave your house.

Consider adding one of the following  pages or groups to your Facebook account to connect professionally with others:

Military Spouse Corporate Career Network: Want to know about hot jobs? Follow MSCCN’s facebook page for information about jobs and opportunities for military spouses.

The Milspo Project: If you are looking for support in your entrepreneurial endeavors, check out The Milspo Project and connect with local networking groups in your community. 

The following are focused Facebook groups where professionals can connect as well:

Career Military Spouses 
Mil-Blogging Buddies 
Military Spouse Network 
Military Spouse PhD Group 
Military Spouse Professional Photographers 
Society of Military Spouses in STEM 

Happy networking!

Story by Jamie Boyle

Congratulations Sarah, on your job with the Department of Environmental Quality!

Challenge: I believe my major hiring challenges were lack of experience in certain areas professionally, my resume and cover letter formats, dealing with long online applications, and applying for jobs that I may not have been fully qualified.  During this time working with an MSCCN representative, I did work full-time and was in school full-time, so another challenge was making time for targeted resume writing and job searching. 

Assistance Received: From the very first week of applying for assistance, I received immediate contact from Jenna either by email, phone, or text. When we did our mock interview, it was the first “interview” I had done in 5 years. Jenna went through each question as if it was a real interview and at the end went through each question and gave me tips and alternate ways to answer questions. I had no idea how much had changed in what employers and hiring managers were looking for as far as resume writing and interview techniques. Jenna checked in with me weekly, if not two or three times weekly. She continually sent me job announcements and resume writing tips. Every time I sent her a targeted resume to review, she had nothing but positive feedback for me and would suggest areas that needed to be changed as far as wording and formatting. I am truly appreciative for all the work she did with me! She has truly been a blessing, and I would probably be in the same situation as a started not knowing about creating targeted resumes, proper ways to job search, and still trying to find a career-oriented job. 

Results: With Jenna’s help, assistance, and resources, I have been selected as a full-time state employee! I sent her the job announcement that fit my experience and education qualifications perfectly along with my targeted resume. I think at that point I had gotten down pat how to do a targeted resume. She said it was perfect and to go ahead and apply! So, I did. It took about a month and then I was called for an interview. With Jenna’s advice and information during our mock interview, I felt pretty confident going in to the interview and when I came out. Within 3 days I heard back from them that I was selected, and they were submitting my packet to Human Resources. I honestly couldn’t believe it! It really happened!! 
 
Value of Experience: I truly feel so blessed being able to use MSCCN’s program. I am pretty sure I would still be job hunting and resume writing in all the wrong ways if I had not gained the knowledge and skills that I have during this time with their representative Jenna Weakly. She was so awesome to work with! Always motivating me, pushing me to apply and do target resumes, and so encouraging! Without her always positive words, guidance, and assistance I would have given up way before I had landed a job. With my own success story, I am hoping to encourage and motivate other military spouses in using this program and how great of a blessing it really is!! I truly appreciate all Jenna’s hard work with me! It has paid off!!

​Story by Jamie Boyle

 

You landed the interview. You showed up early, not just on time. You wore a suit, you didn’t spill your coffee down your shirt. You answered every question they asked with specific, concrete details. You wowed them.

But you look at the clock … there are still ten to fifteen minutes between you and the end of your interview time slot.

Ten to fifteen minutes, and all they have left is, “Do you have any questions?”

Questions?

Of course, you have questions. Well, really one question. Did I get the job?

Somehow, you know that’s not the kind of question they’re looking for.

When it comes to acing the question-asking portion of the interview, the magic doesn’t happen in that last ten to fifteen minutes. Instead, the magic happens the moment you submit your resume. That’s the moment that resume prep ends, and your interview research begins.

You’re going to create a spreadsheet, you’re going to gather information. By the time you walk into that interview, you’re going to know the cost of living for the area vs. the proposed salary, the origin story for the company, and the essential tasks required for the job. And you’re going to know how to ask the right questions.

The secret to asking a good question is curiosity and knowing something about your audience.
You need to appear interested, but not clueless. Invested, but not desperate. Intelligent, but not a know-it-all.

Is this starting to sound like advice for a blind date?

Maybe blind dates and interviews have more in common than meets the eye.

You’re looking to build a relationship with these people. They may be your future bosses or colleagues. They are the ones who will represent who you are to the rest of the company. If you want to give them something good to represent, go in there knowing at least three questions you want to ask, and come up with a fourth based on the interview.

When it comes to your pre-planned questions, start by looking at what the company says about itself. Look at their website, their brand statement, and the ways they are looking to grow. Do they partner with community organizations? Do they have some kind of outreach program? Do they list something about market expansion? Research these organizations, their community, and that new market… Develop a question or two based on what they’ve made available, and where you’d like to help them grow further.

Another question or two for your quiver comes from where you want to be in a few years. You survived the question about your long-term goals and five-year plan… so turnabout is fair play. Ask about how they mentor and grow their employees. What is the career trajectory for the last person to hold your position? What was most surprising for them when they started working for the company? What have they learned as a part of working with this team?

Asking a question is only frightening if you’re asking an audience that doesn’t care. These people care. They want to find the right fit for their company, they want their team to be a success. Come in with a few research-based questions in hand, and you’ll show them you’re committed to their growth. You’ll show them that you’re employee material.

​Story by Emilie Duck

Did you hear the one about the job seeker who wanted to be a barber?

He just couldn’t cut it.

How about the farmer?

He was OUT STANDING in his FIELD.

It’s National Tell a Joke Day!

And there are a lot of jokes and funniness when it comes to job searches, interviews, and all that jazz. I, for one, love a good (bad?) pun.

So, I hope you take today to enjoy telling some good jokes.

Unless you are sitting in an interview.

If you are interviewing today—on the phone, in a group, or one-on-one, today is NOT the day to tell a joke.

Interviews are funny things, and sometimes, we feel compelled to be funny, to be entertaining in them. We want to be likeable, we want to connect, and humor can help us do just that.

But humor can also isolate and distance us from each other, and if the interviewer doesn’t share the interviewee’s sense of humor, the interview can quickly go south.
​
As I mentioned, I love puns. The more groan-worthy, the better. But as strongly as I enjoy puns, others—potential hiring managers—may hate them. So, when I interview, I leave my puns at home.

So, if you are interviewing today, save your jokes for tomorrow. We’ll be at the ready to laugh along with you and celebrate your successful interviewing. 

​Story by Jamie Boyle

It's the middle of August, and that means our third quarter Military Service Employment Journal is live! Today, we've published what we believe is our best quarterly journal yet!

You'll find articles about successful military spouses as well as spouses considering the Military Spouse Dilemma. 

And we have stories for the Veterans and service members in your life--advice on how to talk about their leadership skills and reasons why female Veterans need to self-identify as Veterans.

You'll find information on the cyber-security field and job opportunities with our partners. 

Is there something you'd like us to feature? Let us know!

Remember sharing is caring! Introduce a friend to the MSEJ!

Calm. Peace.  Zen. Chill. Call it what you want. If you are enthusiastic about your work, your passion can take a turn for the worse and sour when you become too invested or too overextended. If you find that your focus leaves you feeling wrapped around the axle instead of productive, consider the following to keep your cool.
​

1. Take a breath and take a break. I’ve met too many people who believe they have to work through lunch, morning ‘til night, to be effective and to get stuff done.  But research (as shown in this great article from Psychology Today) points to the need for breaks—for your mental and physical health, to combat decision fatigue, and to increase productivity and creativity.
2. Detach and go offline. As much as breaks are needed throughout the day, shutting down shop at the end of the day or shift gives you the chance to unwind and focus on other aspects of your life. Refreshing and spending time away is important if you want the time you spend on your work to be focused and meaningful. So, do yourself a favor, and skip the constant email checking, and help your team out by keeping communications within standard business hours.
3. Stay in your lane. This one is hard for me. I see something that could be better, and I want to jump in with both feet and improve it now. While it’s wonderful to be a go-getter and provide support outside of your professional duties, It’s easy to become overwhelmed if you try to improve every aspect of your work environment.
4. Say your peace, and let it go. When you have concerns, it’s best to share them with the appropriate person, but then, move on. You’ve met your responsibility, and now it’s time for others to meet theirs. Move on to the work that is yours to do.
5. Remember, you are a drop in the bucket. When I was a student teacher a thousand years ago, I felt like every success and failure lay at my feet. I (wrongly in hindsight) believed that my influence could lead to wholly disastrous or wonderful results. The thing is, we are all drops in a bucket. We have our roles to play and our duties to accomplish, but it isn’t your job to fill the whole bucket.
6. Accept help. Many of us believe we have to do it all on our own. We say, “It’s my responsibility, I’ll do it.” But sometimes, given the season of life we are in, we may need additional support, and it’s ok to ask others to help. You’d do it for them, right?
7. Communicate your needs. Others can’t help you if they don’t know you need it. While everyone you work with doesn’t need to know all of your business, letting others know where you are and what’s going on can help them help you and set their expectations.
8. Say “no.” Duties as assigned is all the rage, but depending on your work or volunteer status, you don’t have to say “yes” to everything. It’s perfectly reasonable to admit you can’t get something done if it’s extra.
9. Set expectations. The alternative to saying “no” (when you feel like “no” isn’t an option) is to say, “yes, but…” If you feel passionate about helping with the project, then help with it, but set expectations so that you don’t overcommit.
10. Recognize your accomplishments. Many of us look at our to-do lists and focus on the entries left to complete. But it’s important to also recognize what you’ve already done. Celebrate your accomplishments rather than harping on what still needs to be done. Tomorrow’s another day, and there’ll be more time for work. It’s important to take the time to recognize the progress you’ve made.

What do you do to stay calm at work? We want to know! Tell us on Facebook. In the meanwhile, I wish you many calm and peaceful work days!

Story by Jamie Boyle

The best books are ones we can relate to, that detail experience we are familiar with. Books that challenge traditional ideas, cause one to pause, rethink and reconsider.

Further, we believe that understanding military life is really important when it comes to making sense of issues—like spousal employment and education—that impact military families. Fiction, non-fiction, poetry—they all have the ability to help us make sense out of our shared experiences.

If you are looking for a few titles to add to your reading list, check out these titles:

Waiting Wives: The Story of Schilling Manor-Vietnam, Home Front to the Vietnam War by Donna Moreau
This true story is told through the eyes of a military child during the Vietnam war. She describes her life at Schilling Manor in Kanas, a home for wives and children of deployed service members. Author Donna Moreau details this tragic time when the American people turned their backs on the US military because of their views on the unpopular war. Service members’ wives were expected sit quietly waiting with little communication and absolutely no empathy from the outside world. “Waiting Wives” reminds us we can support the military and their families regardless of our political views and opinions.    
​
In an Instant: A Family’s Journey of Love and Healing by Lee and Bob Woodruff
Many may not remember when ABC World News Tonight’s anchor Bob Woodruff was injured while embedded with the military in Iraq. He suffered a severe brain injury and probably would have died if not for the soldiers at his side. I read this book during my husband’s second tour in Iraq, I know that seems crazy, but it was not just about his injury, this book was co-written by Bob’s wife and describes their love affair before the incident and how that love helped them survive a terrible time. When faced with this horrific event Lee Woodruff drew from her strength and adapted to a new normal, we as military spouses can relate to her story.  

KGI Series by Maya Banks
This series follows six brothers serving in different branches of the military. The first in the series follows a recently widowed Ethan Kelly as he tries to cope with guilt over his wife’s death. He soon discovers she is alive and uses his Navy SEAL training to save her, but survival means facing a dark secret. The series probably won’t give insight into the real lives of military spouses, but it’s a good escape for those who love a romance novel featuring a sexy man in uniform.

Permanent Change of Station by Lisa Stice
Lisa Stice uses poetry to bring life to the daily experiences of a military spouse. She gives levity to mundane household chores and a voice to the family dog who must leave his well-marked yard for places unknown. This is a great choice when you need a little humor to get through the day.

Found Art: Discovering Art in Foreign Places by Leeana Tankersley
This a memoir of a military spouse living in the Middle East with her Navy Seal husband during the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. Her story is told through seemly common place items but Leeana uses them to highlight the beauty and art she discovered along her journey.     

You Know When the Men Are Gone by Siobhan Fallon
In the height of the Iraq war, entire divisions would deploy. I can remember the ghost town Ft Stewart became when all the soldiers were gone. You Know When the Men are Gone is fiction, however it could easily be based on real spouses. This story follows several military spouses living on base at Ft Hood as their husbands are at war and describes what is it like for those left to keep the home fires burning.

If these books leave you with the desire to begin writing your own story, I have one more suggestion:

Veterans in the Media: Creatives Military by Justin Sloan
This book gives advice on how to transition to a creative career, and the best part the advice comes from military veterans who not only transitioned out of the military but transformed their lives by following their passion. If you are thinking about pursuing a creative career this book is for you! Once you’ve finished reading it stop by MSCCN.org to register and we can help you transform your career.
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Need more resources to jump start your own writing? Email Emilie at educk@casy.us for suggestions. 

​Story by Jamie Boyle

​As military spouses, we often joke that the only consistency is the lack of consistency—the changing locations, the changing orders, the days that go long, the training that will happen at some point, the fragility of your best laid plans. And yet, there’s a sense of consistency and stability in the knowledge that things are going to be a mess. You expect it, you sometimes embrace it, you definitely roll your eyes at it, and you look forward. Somewhere, out there in the future, there is the hope, the dream, that someday things won’t be a mess because it will be later, because you will be out of this military life.
 
I’m writing from just this side of “later,” almost two months on the other side of “out,” and I’ve got to say… I’m still waiting for that consistency to kick in. For the dream to be realized. For the mattress to come. There is going to be an “after,” it’s on its way, but as is often the case, “after can get a little lost (like that moving request that delayed your movers and your HHG). Technically I’m on the other side of military life, but there are still traces. Our HHG were stuck in Arkansas for six weeks, and they’re currently somewhere between Little Rock and New York. We’ve lived that hotel life, kicked ourselves for things we didn’t self-carry, and are still driving around our new town, trying to call it “home.”
 
The word doesn’t quite roll off the tongue yet. Sometimes it gets stuck.
 
We do have a place to live, and for that I’m truly thankful. It’s going to be beautiful, and it’s going to see us through the phase of our lives. Even from an air mattress on the floor, that’s abundantly clear. But there’s a difference between a house and a home, just as there’s a difference between visiting a place next and living there. I don’t know how long it will take for me to stop feeling like a visitor, to know that this is where we’re meant to be. It’s like those first few weeks after a deployment, when my husband and I moved through our lives grateful, but ever-so-slightly out of step.
 
Even when you know you’ve made the right choice, there can be a longing for what you knew. At least then there was a version of “right” or “normal” that you could carry around in your head. With the known, you have coping strategies, and maybe even a close friend or two to see you through. When you’re tossed into a new place without any of those structures, it’s natural to want to burrow down (even if your burrow is a mattress on the floor, and you’ve started to wonder if you could consider paper towels a form of bath linens to avoid the laundromat before your HHG arrive).
 
And yet. This is going to be your home. There are people out there that you are destined to meet—people who will sustain you through the next chapter of your life. There are places that will become “yours,” routes that will become familiar, and events that will become traditions. You will have a chance to revisit dreams you laid aside. You could even order one of those stamps with a return address on it for the very first time.
 
If you’re in a place that doesn’t feel quite like home, or if you’re feeling out of step, that’s entirely normal. There’s a reason we’re supposed to be “transitioning” out of military life. From a grammar perspective, the “ing” at the end of “transitioning” means that it’s an ongoing process, a series of shifts over time. In the event that you need a friendly wave from across the miles, and a suggestion or two from a friend to get you through these shifts, consider me your friend. I’m waving to you from New York and sending the things that are keeping me tethered to this new post-Army life:

​These suggestions are small, and they don’t solve all of the unknowns. I’m still looking for a PCM, have yet to update my LinkedIn® page, and almost cried when I realized that my closest emergency contact aside from my spouse is over ten hours away. But they are opportunities for smaller new beginnings, and that’s something that I can embrace—one library book, one long walk in the park, at a time. 

Story by Emilie Duck